(Story by Sabrine H from Chemistry and Numbers 2: Sexy, Funny, Horrifying, and Yes, Successful Online Dating Stories from more than 50 Online Daters)
The allure of online dating doesn’t sound like the mundane pastime. Online dating is relatively new to this generation. This is the new trend in the 21st century. This is a trend that is becoming increasingly popular these days. There are heavier volumes of online dating because of its reliability and convenience factors. Online dating has its pros and cons. It is beneficial for those who haven’t been successful meeting people at social venues. It is also a social utility network that connects people and creates friendships which can ultimately lead to romantic relationships. On the other hand, online dating can pose serious problems because of the way it is perceived in society. It may be taboo to right wing folks while it may be trite to the young generation. Online dating presents the problem of impulse control issues. For some people who can’t control their impulses, online dating may not be the right path to take. There is an element of temptation with online dating because a person may feel emotionally invested right away. Lust then starts to creep in and set the tone of the relationship.
It is also hard to sustain an online dating relationship for a long time. Longevity is hard to maintain in the online dating world. I can attest to the fact that online dating is short-term rather than long-term. I just recently got out of a month long relationship with a guy who I dated online for a while. We met through facebook, the social network website and we hung out and dated for a couple of weeks. The outcome wasn’t very successful. In retrospect, the relationship didn’t really have any potential because it was hasty instead of gradual. During the first week when we just met, I thought that we were going to be platonic friends; however, we mutually decided to take things to another level by becoming boyfriend/girlfriend. I do regret moving too fast because now that I think about it if we started off as friends then maybe our relationship could have lasted longer than a month. The irony behind all of this is that we both talked about marriage and we both wanted a future together. I asked myself: “Is it really possible for me to fall in love with a guy I met through facebook?” I thought I was in love with the guy but then I realized that it wasn’t love but lust. I got carried away with my emotions and I let them dictate the relationship. I also asked myself: “Is it common for people to fall in love through online dating?” Then I asked: “Is online dating the cupid’s arrow to romance?”
Online dating is like a short cut to dating. It speeds up the dating process. People who want instant gratification are prone to online dating. Pardon the stereotypes and the generalizations but I feel that online dating is geared towards impatient people who won’t wait for the right opportunity to present itself. They would much rather make things happen by making the first move.
There are various forms of dating such as speed dating and blind dates. Speed dating is ideal for those who feel like time is money. People who have the strong desire to date are the ones who would immerse themselves to speed dating.
I am not an advocate of online dating but I do appreciate its contributions to the dating world. If it wasn’t for online dating, then perhaps many people would still be single and lonely. Various studies about online dating have been conducted and they’ve shown the remarkable camaraderie that the people shared right off the bat. The founders of eharmony.com believe that online dating is a great way for people to meet their soul mates.
So going back to my abbreviated relationship, I wanted to say that it didn’t last very long. We only saw each other once a week. We didn’t really get to know each other. We just pounced in the relationship. Then, the guy told me that we had nothing in common. So, this was my first online dating experience and it wasn’t a success. It was a flop.
What I didn’t mention was that I was dating anther guy on the side. We weren’t dating but we had a “friends with benefits” relationship. This only lasted a month as well. It is so ironic how both of these romantic encounters ended on the same week. I was two timing and this made matters worse.
So after an unsuccessful online dating experience, I ask myself: “Will I give online dating another chance?” The answer to this question is maybe. I won’t rely solely on online dating because there are other forms of dating. There are arranged dating strategies in which family members or friends pair couples up.
In a nutshell, online dating has its perks but it shouldn’t be the only dating strategy. You can’t just expect to sit in front of a computer all day waiting for that special someone to e-mail you. Prince charming isn’t always going to be online. In our society, technology is getting in the way of the traditional social gatherings. Most people these days spend hours chatting online in chat rooms. They don’t leave the house because of their fixation with the internet.
Online dating isn’t for everyone. If you like to take risks and live on the edge, then online dating is the right approach. If you like to play it safe, then try the conventional dating methods.
I will give online dating another shot. I hope that it will work for me this time around. Three strikes and then I’m out on the online thing. After three attempts, I’ll give up on it and find other ways to meet people.
There is so much hype these days about online dating especially with websites such as match.com and eharmony.com. There are so much many advertisements and commercials these days. This is a distraction to society; however, it unites society and creates more chemistry.