The sooner you realize this sad but true fact, the sooner you can get on with finding Mr. Close-Enough-To-Perfect. Prince Charming, riding on a white stallion, lost his way or found Princess Charming and got married on his way to your castle. Get over it and get on with it. You ARE going to have to actively seek the man of your dreams and you won’t find him hiding under your bed. You already know that he isn’t among the men that you are acquainted with so, now what? Online dating is “what”.
It’s true that online dating, while in its infancy, was only made up of perverts, sexual predators, nerds and weirdoes but that is no longer true. It has become the main tool of the single person in every developed country in the world. Forty million people can’t all be wrong. Ask your girl friends if they have ever used online dating or are using it now. If they are honest with you, most of them have or are now members of at least one online dating site and maybe more than one. It really is the way to go to meet eligible men who want to meet you. It doesn’t matter what any of your numbers are…like age, height, weight or income either. Somewhere out there in the big wide world there is a man who will like you…..then love you….and think that you are beautiful and desirable. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” is true. What is considered beautiful in one part of the world is completely different from what is considered beautiful in another part of the world. It’s even different from one part of this country to another.
Find an online dating site that fits your needs. Write a great profile and post a flattering picture. Start contacting eligible men on the site. Mr. Close-enough-to-perfect could be a few mouse clicks away.
Setting Yourself Up For Disappointment
I think the number one lesson that most of us forget is, that: people don’t come into our lives ready-made for us.
We are all human, and therefore inherently imperfect. We have different outlooks on life, hobbies, jobs, families, relationships, and emotional behaviors. We are unique because no two people are the same.
There is a difference between someone who is perfect on paper and someone who shares our similar, important values.
It is when we build a relationship with them: we learn their flaws, their insecurities, their life passions and worst fears: that’s the beautiful part of romance.
Love Comes When You Least Expect It
Give yourself the opportunities to meet new people by all means – get out there, talk to people, put yourself in situations where you will meet exciting new people. But putting that pressure on yourself to find ‘the one’, will just hinder you.
It’ll exhaust you. You’ll end up spending your life looking for a romantic spark in every man you meet. It means you’ll be disappointed when it doesn’t happen exactly when you want it to.
Love comes (genuinely) when you’re so preoccupied with other things in your life that they just walk into your life and bam! There is someone you’d like to get to know and see where it goes.
They may not be packaged as ‘the one I will spend the rest of my life with’ at this point. But in time, they could be.
Everyone has one. Whether it is subconscious, or written down: most people have a checklist of character or personal traits which they look for in another person when dating. If the person they come across does not tick a significant number of these boxes, we disregard them as not being suitable for us.
Whether it be that they have to be 6ft or taller, or have brown eyes, or enjoy football or support a certain political party, all these criteria actually actively hinder our dating lives. We have in our heads a hypothetical, imagined ideal picture of who we want – even before we go out and meet new people.